Thursday, February 12, 2009

Drama at the doctor's office

Today Big Dog and Little Dog had their annual check ups.  Fine, if you want to get all into the details, Big Dog should have had his in October, but have you tried to schedule a well visit lately?  Well I have.  Turns out if you try to schedule it in November the soonest you can get is late January.  If you have a child turning two just a couple of weeks later, it seems like a smart, well organized, shooting for fewer trips to the doctor mommy would wait until the younger son had his birthday and get them out of the way in one go.
Well, it would seem like a good idea to do them both at once, but trying to wrangle two kids in a pediatrician's office was a bit more um, exciting, than I had bargained.  It worked out, and on the plus side, it was much easier to get Little Dog to go through the "open your mouth, take a deep breath, step on the scale," routine when he was mimicking his big brother.  The downside, he also wanted a turn at the hearing test and vision screening that aren't part of the 3-year-old check up.  
It all worked out and it went well.  The boys are exceptionally healthy and developing just as they should, if not slightly ahead of schedule.  The pediatrician made a few recommendations (yes Big Dog, you are getting a couple of daily chores, the doctor made me do it!) and was getting ready to say good bye when I asked him "Is there any, um, unpleasantness that needs to happen?"  
He looked confused for a moment, then understood. "Well, Little Dog is in the clear, but Big Dog needs three.  She'll be in in just a moment to do that."  We said our goodbyes and he headed out.
At that point Big Dog and Little Dog were convinced it was time to go.  I tried to stall.  "We have one more thing to do, we have to wait," bought me a couple of minutes.  "Hold on, it won't be much longer," stalled a few more.  But when I was asked if he could put his shoes on, and I said no, Big Dog knew something was up.
With a look of sheer suspicion, he asked, "What are we waiting for?"
Busted.  He knew. "Sweetie, you have to have a shot," and the screaming started. I tried to soothe him before every other child in the office became convinced that some thing truly evil was happening in exam room #7.
"It'll be quick, I'm sure it won't hurt much." 
"I don't want a shot!" he howled like a wounded animal, followed by a flood of tears.  (Can you imagine the response if he knew it was really three shots???)  It was miserable.
When the time came to have the shots it took me and a nurse to hold him down for the three quick jabs.  It was a workout.  My healthy well developed boy is also incredibly strong!   We got him dressed and were ready to leave, but all of a sudden, Big Dog was not so ready to leave.
"I can't walk!" he sobbed,"It hurts so bad, my legs don't work."
We finally got into the hall and passed the pediatrician who looked on slightly concerned by Big Dog's slow movement.
"Apparently the shots broke his legs," I explained, "He can't walk." I added with a smile to let him know there was no real issue.
"Yes," he replied seriously "I've heard of that, but it rarely ever happens," and went on to see his next patient with a little amused grin.
Gotta love a sarcastic doctor.  Or at least I sure do.


Nauntie Lush said...

Great I have to take Bacon to get 4 shots in 2 weeks. (So he can register for Kindergarten) I am taking Mr. Tantrum to hold him down and probably 11 Xanax so I don't lose my mind. Thankfully they are getting big enough where they won't have to have too many more, and you can totally bribe them with a toy to cooperate. Or at least try to.

I hope his broken legs are healed soon!

Beth said...

Poor guy! Three shots in one day. That is just too much. Give him ice cream for breakfast. And lunch and dinner, too.

Heather said...

Wow, what an event! Poor Big Dog! How did Little Dog feel seeing his big brother suffer like that? Sad!

Mamacat said...

LOL! doctor's visits are always so much fun. I'm glad I'm not the only one who has eventful trips. Am blogging on doctor-y topic tonight too (but nowhere near the comedy your little ones provide).

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