I do not much care for days like today. Days where the skies are grey and the greyness seems to seep into the lives beneath it. Days when I look at my "baby" and realize he no longer a baby, nor a toddler. Days when I realize their rapid pace growth is not likely to slow down. Days when I realize that soon I will not have little boys at all, soon they will be big. Days when I admit there will be no third baby because as nice as Mr. Dog tries to be about it, he really is done. Days when I realize I am a middle aged woman, not the young person my mind thinks I am. Days when I feel like a middle aged woman. Days when I look at the world around me and think that more people are cruel and crappy than I'd admitted before. Days when I feel powerless to fix that. Days when I worry that no matter what I do, things will still be screwed up. Days when I realize I probably don't do as much as I can. Days when I realize that progress is slow and as soon as we become complacent we quietly backslide and lose our newly gained ground.
In April of 2005, my husband and I packed up our two dogs and toddler and moved to Seattle from the San Francisco Bay area. Shortly after our move, I became pregnant with our second child. As exciting as this was, it definitely put a cramp in my ability to explore our new home town. I'm still working hard at adjusting to the new digs.
As a working mom to two small boys, I manage to keep pretty busy. Between business meetings, play dates and pediatrician appointments, there isn't much time left for personal pursuits. But that is a trade off I am willing to make. I'll find time for myself when the boys are old enough to borrow the car, right?
And as though that isn't enough, when we moved we bought our first house, a major fixer upper. Yeah, we wanted the "this Old House" experience, but little did I realize that it would lead to such great experiences, like the sudden loss of running water from a broken water main, or a leaky sewer pipe that kept the toilet off limits for days.
All I can say is that life sure is interesting!