Little Dog is in a particularly funny stage right now. For this reason, I'm taking down a few of my favorite recent Little Dog utterances.
Tonight, after dinner I baked a batch of cookies. I keep the dough in the fridge and only bake up a few at a time. This helps with portion control and more than that, everyone knows hot, fresh from the oven cookies are way better than baked a couple days ago cookies (or the stomach ache a delicious cookie binge can cause). After he polished off his cookie, Little Dog sidles over to me and says, "Anymore cookies?"
"Nope, no more. You had one and that's enough for a boy your size," I say.
"I'm sorry to say this, but I just discovered something about you," he says with disapproval in his tone. "You're the meanest mom ever."
Mr. Dog steps in immediately, "Wow, I guess she won't be making you any more cookies again."
As soon as Little Dog realized this might be true, he had to make amends, "Don't you know I was just kidding?" and because I didn't immediately respond he said it again...and again.
Big Dog took the opportunity to step in, "Mama, I'll bet you can't read my lips?" And proceeds to mouth, "You're the best mom EVER!" Thanks kid!
Little Dog is in a phase that involves putting his hand in his pants. Or maybe he's just male. Either way, he does it a lot. The other day I saw him with his hand down the back of his pants and told him he needed to take his hands out of his pants and go wash his hands. I figure this is a good practice. He figures I'm gullible.
"Mama, I didn't have my hand in my pants?" he says.
"Yes you did. I saw you. Go wash your hands."
"That wasn't me," he says, looking me right in the eyes.
"Really? Funny because it looked just like you," I say wondering what his next move would be.
"It wasn't me, it was a hologram!" And here I was, not even aware that he knew what a hologram was.
At soccer class on Saturday the coach had Little Dog's class playing games to practice their shooting. One game was called "Asteroid." The premise is that the coach's soccer ball is an asteroid that will smash into a planet if it is not stopped before it reaches the opposite end of the practice field. Each child has a soccer ball that they can use to kick at the coach's ball. If it connects with the ball, tragedy is averted, the planet survives! After explaining the rules, the coach says the first planet at risk is Pluto. Immediately Little Dog speaks up. "Pluto is NOT a planet. It's a DWARF planet," he says loudly and sternly. The coach looked a little shaken by the news. Or maybe that a 5 year old just schooled him. Either way, it was amusing.
Pasta ala Fridge
5 years ago