In Big Dog's after school program they bribe the kids into their best behavior. I'm not opposed to it, with that many kids I think you use whatever tactics work. Hell, with two kids I resort to bribery more than I care to admit. But that's not what this post is about. At any rate, in the after school program, kids who behave are rewarded with "Club Bucks" (also known as buttons) and at the end of the week they can buy prizes from the Club Store. One week when I picked Big Dog up he was clutching his newest prize. He held it out for me to see, excited about the green tube.
"Oh! It's a water weenie!" I exclaimed, reminded of toys from my youth.
"Mama! That's so inappropriate!" I was immediately scolded.
"No, really, that's what we called them!" I tried. Turns out that's not what they call them now. In our more modern world, they're called water snakes (which just sounds like a euphemism if you ask me). But Big Dog was having none of my explanation. I even got the Director of the after school program over to back me up on this. Which thankfully he did or Big Dog would continue to think I'm even more twisted than I actually am.
Fast forward a couple of months. Last night for dinner I served homemade maple baked beans with chicken sausages (at least for the boys, I passed on the sausage being a vegetarian and all). Kind of a modern, slightly upscale version of beenie weenies from when I was a kid. As I was serving up the plates I decided to shock and horrify Big Dog all over again.
"When I was a kid we had a special name for hot dogs and baked beans served together," I said. "Can you guess what we called them?"
He thought for a moment, looked me right in the eye and said, "Penises?"
Um no. But that shut me right up. And anything I could say after that kind of lost its impact.
Pasta ala Fridge
5 years ago