Big Dog has always liked the ladies. His primary playmates at school have long tended to be female. Even as young as 3, he had a snuggly relationship with a little girl in his class, they'd sit together, his arm around her, her head on his shoulder, just kicking back during free play. It was kind of cute. Then we changed schools and Big Dog got some new girlfriends. At his new school, he adored two little girls and in turn they adored him right back. He'd get drawings and notes from them and he'd make special presents for them too. At one point they got into arguments over who was going to marry Big Dog, but he wasn't sure he was ready for marriage. (I was kind of proud of that level of maturity.)
When Big Dog started kindergarten, it wasn't surprising to me that he found a girl he especially liked. What did surprise me was how soon he found the next object of his affection. He is now on the third girl to adore. This one seems more serious. In the car on the way home the other night, Big Dog let me in on his little secret.
"Mama, I really like Sadie."
"That's great," I said, "She's a great girl."
"No, Mama, I really like Sadie," he repeated because I had not shown the proper level of interest.
"Ok. I like her too," I tried again.
"Mama, I like her a lot. I might love her," he continued.
"I see," I said, trying to work my way through traffic and still be engaged with the conversation.
"Mama, I may want to marry her."
"Well, I think you're a little young to get married right now," I offered, "but when you grow up and are ready to get married, if you choose Sadie, I'd be happy. She's a nice person and I'd be happy to have her as a daughter-in-law. I like her mom too, so that's an added plus."
"I don't want to marry her right now," he said giving it some thought, "but I do love her."
"I think she's a good choice and I'm happy you like her so much. But really, no matter who you choose, when you get ready to marry someone, as long as they are a good person and they treat you nicely, I'll be happy to have them in our family."
He was quiet for a little bit. "Mama, what if I find someone better?"
"Listen, Sadie is a great girl. She's exciting and amazing in her own way. You may find someone who is exciting and amazing in a different way that makes you happy too. Just remember, no one is actually 'better' than anyone else. Just a better fit for you at the time."
"Right. No one is better. Just different," he repeated back. "But I love Sadie right now. I might love someone else later."
I never realized the male search for "better" started this early. Raising boys is fascinating.
Pasta ala Fridge
5 years ago