Ferris Bueller had it right. "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." Yep, that just about sums things up. I'm sure I'm not telling you anything you don't already know, and if you are looking for a post chock full of novel insights into parenting and life, feel free to abandon this one right now. I won't be offended.
The thing is that my life has been cruising right along lately. Especially the past few months, I've been so worried about everything that might go wrong, or needs to be dealt with or prepared for, I've more or less stopped thinking about what is. I focus on getting through things, look forward to the end of a phase or wait for the next month to bring something new. I worry about all of the little issues that crop up, blow them out of proportion and fail to recognize the important things that are dropping along the wayside. Maybe it's that I turned 40 this year, maybe it's that my job can be as overwhelming as I let it be if I have no stops in place. Or maybe it's that all of us are doing too much in too little time which becomes a pretty addictive rush if you never take a break to put things back in the proper proportions.
Over the past few weeks I've been confronted with a number of events that have made me stop and reevaluate. A friend's child facing life changing surgery, the death of a friend's beloved family pet, the illness of another, a coworker's child with a mystery illness and another young and vibrant life cut short by a particularly aggressive form of cancer. Add to that friends worrying out the complex details of relationship, aging and careers. All of this keeps coming in on what feels like unrelenting waves. It is enough to stun me into a bit of introspection.
And guess what, when put into perspective, my life is really freakin' good. My kids are healthy and smart, even if they are a bit challenging at times (wonder where they get that from?). My marriage is strong, if at times somewhat neglected. I have a family that is loving and not at all dysfunctional, who give me endless support and no judgement. My friendships are enduring and energizing, even if we all admit that distance can increase the need for scheduled check ins. Even my career is solid and I mostly love my job despite feeling the need to force a bit of new growth. Yes, I deal with speed bumps from time to time, but like all speed bumps they are disruptive but temporary. And if I heed them, they might even make me take time to slow down and look around once in a while, which is actually a good thing since I'd really hate to miss it.
Pasta ala Fridge
12 years ago
3 comments:
i like to remember how lucky/happy/blessed i am too. i wish i could remember more often.
Erin,
I forget too. The thing that is getting me right now is how much I lament the boys getting older and at the same time end up wishing away the time because we're caught up dealing with a problem at home or at work, or even with one of the kids. I forget that they are only going to be a pain in the ass of this particular age ONCE and I'd better learn to appreciate the ups and the downs before they're all grown up. And our down aren't even all that far down, so I really need to get the hell over it.
No shame in realizing things are pretty good. :)
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