Because Auntie Chihuahua is part of the old Walter Street crew, we had friends fly in to celebrate with her. My Stan came on on Wednesday, Maria and Mark, with their two kids came in on Friday, Eddie and Dave were also in town (though I'm not sure what day they arrived). It was like a reunion of the most wonderful people I've ever known. And yet, tonight as the celebration winds down, I'm feeling sad. Not because it's over, but because it will never be the same again.
In my mind we are all just slightly older, but still deadly cool versions of who we were back then. And in some ways, it's true. In small groups, the clique still clicks, but the group dynamic has forever altered. Though we lived in the same building way back when, and are as connected as family in many ways, our day to day lives have changed us. And since we are no longer seeing those changes in each other as gradual evolutions by being in close proximity, the changes seem more extreme when we do meet up.
Relationships, parenthood, changes in career, family and general circumstances have added dimensions to each of us that seem if not completely foreign then at least somewhat out of place in the friends we think we know as well as we know ourselves.
The lack of time to reacquaint only adds to the strain, and the friendships continue, but with a a new disjointed quality that is leaving me longing for the old days. It is never easy to stay connected, but in this case I always felt that the bond would self heal. I no longer have that delusion.
2 comments:
Ahhh... it is funny how our relationships evolve. Sounds like a fun weekend.
That is very sad, but I know it also to be true. Those changes have torn apart my old 'clique' and in some ways that is good, in others it makes me sad. You are lucky that your friendships have at least stayed in tact.
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